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Death of Happiness

The Death of Happiness

You’ve been there, I’ve been there, cramming the night before a big test trying to get familiar enough with the information just to pass the test. Why do we do it? Because we procrastinate and why do we procrastinate? Because there is something else we would rather be doing.

Some people are more prone to procrastination than others and not all procrastination is bad. But when it interferes with work, family or your social life it could be a problem. We all need stress to keep us going but too much of the wrong stress can lead to serious health issues. If you procrastinate a lot it can lead to missed deadlines and not having enough time in a day (week) to get important tasks taken care of. Negative consequences will begin to affect your happiness – thus procrastination could lead to the death of happiness.

Getting the most out of your day should be a major concern. You don’t want to get into a bad habit of reflecting on everything that you did not get done, instead you want to reflect on how much you accomplished and feel good about it. It is difficult to know which tasks take the most priority therefore, you need to define your priorities by setting goals.

Living a positive thinking life doesn’t mean you won’t procrastinate from time to time. But letting it rob you of your happiness is unacceptable and avoidable. If you have things that are on your list that you don’t find much pleasure in doing and they need to get done then start your day by doing them first. Get the less desirable things done first and then move to the things that bring you much more satisfaction. That way, when you end the day you feel good about all that you have accomplished. By making this one small change you can end your day on a positive note.

Achieving Success at Work

Achieving Success at Work When Surrounded by Slackers

Keeping a positive attitude at work may be difficult at times but in the long run it will pay off.

You would think that if you were surrounded by slackers at work you would stand out like a sore thumb. Unfortunately, that doesn’t always feel like the case. You may witness people sitting around gossiping, reading magazines and surfing the internet several hours per day but somehow they keep it under the radar. They find a way to prove their usefulness from time to time. While the responsible hard worker has set the bar high and they are expected to perform to the standards they have set.

On occasion slackers will be promoted based on what upper management perceived as a job well done but it is likely they will not meet the new expectations set before them and they will fail. It is important to not let what others do get in the way of what you value. You should never give up and let your work suffer because it appears you can get a paycheck for doing nothing. People will eventually notice and your chances of moving up or in this day and age simply holding a job will increase.

It can be hard to keep a positive outlook but remember, you have to live with yourself. You need to look yourself in the mirror and answer for your actions. What others do with their lives shouldn’t directly, or indirectly, affect yours. People that strive to be positive need to focus on what will make them happy and where they see themselves years down the road. People that strive to be positive have vision! People with a positive attitude take charge of their lives and make it what they want life to be. Things don’t always work out the way we expect; the occasional right hook from nowhere knocks us off balance. Instead of falling to the ground and being a victim we get up, brush ourselves off and get back on track.

If you have to watch from your office or cubicle someone that sits around and does nothing all day don’t let it get to you. Your hard work and efforts will pay off, if not at this company another one.

Dealing with Difficult People

Dealing with A-Holes

We can’t get through life without running into those people that seem to think the world revolves around them and they are so much better than us. Wouldn’t it be grand if everyone followed the rules and were courteous with one another? It is nice to dream but we all know it will never happen. Obviously we all make mistakes but is it necessary to have rude people cut you off in traffic and act like it was your fault just because you were there first? What about the Dr’s office receptionist who’s quick to cancel your appointment because you were 5 minutes late yet has no problem holding you 20 minutes acting like your time is less important? Nevertheless we all deal with an A-hole from time to time and instead of letting them take control of our feelings we should keep the day on track. Here’s how:

Remember when you let others influence your feelings you are giving them control, you are the victim. Often times, it isn’t worth getting upset and speeding up to flip off the asshole that cut you off – it isn’t going to make you feel any better. It can be tough to take the high road and let things slide but in the end it feels so much better.

Remind yourself of your goal to stay positive; you don’t want to get to your destination pissed off or treat the next person you meet poorly. When we get to work in the morning we want to start the day on a good note. When we get home at the end of the day we want to embrace our family with love. When we get to the check stand at the grocery store we want to be respectful. Don’t ruin someone else’s day just because someone tried to piss on yours.

There are rude people everywhere, sadly many don’t even realize how their behavior affects others because to them the world revolves around them. Someday they will get a dose of reality but that’s not for you and I to worry about. We only have control of ourselves.

The next time you find your patience tested take a minute; take a deep breath, take another, smile and treat it as a fart in the wind. Here one second gone the next.

When Positive Thinking Isn't Enough

When Positive Thinking Isn’t Enough

I’ve probably said it with countless others that all you need is positive thinking to be successful. It’s true that focusing on the positive is much more beneficial than the negative. However, we all have beliefs that may prove untrue and lead to negative thinking. Rather than allow these beliefs to get in the way of success they should be dealt with, changed or replaced. Success won’t just come from a positive attitude it requires hard work, planning, critical thinking and a bit of luck. Combined with positive thinking our dreams and aspirations become possible.

I wonder… have you ever heard the story of Roger Bannister? Roger Bannister was the first person (of record) to break the 4-minute mile. His success, and the many others that shortly followed, didn’t come from simply thinking it could be done. Obviously they believed it could be done otherwise they would never have attempted it (or spent countless hours training for it). Positive thinking and the belief in something may help you get out of the bed in the morning but it won’t get you over the finish line. For that you need to understand your goals and how you are going to get from point A to B. You need a plan!

Any plan to succeed is going to require critical thinking, hard work and luck from time to time. You need to know what you’re up against, what works and what doesn’t, how to overcome the unexpected and what to do to stay motivated.

The power of positive thinking isn’t enough to make you successful but it will get you further than being a negative nelly. Negative people typically don’t even try to succeed – what’s the point, it wouldn’t work anyway, right?

Believe, Plan, Work Hard, Make Wise Decisions and with a bit of luck you can be closer to the success you‘ve always hoped and dreamt of.

Help Positive Thinking

Help! I’m Stuck

When people reach the age 35, 40, 45 many feel they are stuck in life – that someone else has been calling all the shots and they either have to live with it or do something about it. Some take the time to question why and initiate change while others simply shrug it off and continue down the same path. Too often people become complacent in their current circumstances and they let their dreams take a backseat to the day-to-day minutia. The routine of going to work, taking care of the family, being a taxi, cleaning, cooking and daily chores can quickly snub out any motivation to pursue their dreams and aspirations. But a busy lifestyle doesn’t mean that you can’t change your priorities and become the person you once dreamt of. Before you can effectively make the necessary changes you first need to know how people get stuck, below are 5 of the most common:

  1. Directionless – We all had goals and dreams when we were growing up. We make a plan on how we’re going to achieve them such as going to college or taking classes but something happens later in life and the drive to meet those goals is lost or newer challenging goals aren’t ever made. People lose direction and the motivation to make changes in their lives.
  2. Exhausted – In this dog eat dog world it is easy to overschedule, play less, work more and get run down. By the end of the day we are exhausted and don’t have the desire or motivation to pursue change.
  3. Overwhelmed – There just doesn’t seem to be enough time in the day to get everything done and there are way too many demands. The “to do” list never seems to get any shorter no matter how fast tasks are checked off. When a person is already overwhelmed the last thing they really want to do is add another task to their daily ritual.
  4. Hopeless –We all feel hopeless from time to time. We don’t know where to turn due to lack of focus and obstacles, pain and hardship can also lead to a hopeless state.
  5. Conflict – Have you ever thought that there is simply too much conflict in the world? Well there probably is but who has time to worry about the world when our daily lives are filled with it. Conflict happens at home with our children and spouse, at work with co-workers and trying to exit the parking lot after a football game. People that are surrounded by conflict find it difficult to avoid getting stuck in life. It is hard to push on while in the midst of poor communication, excessive arguing and misunderstandings.
  6. Worthless – If people don’t feel loved, appreciated or needed they can begin to feel worthless and worthless feeling people have a hard time being motivated to change their lives.

If you are tired of feeling stuck in life you need to consider the following questions. They will help you determine the type of change you want in your life and the goals needed to begin getting unstuck.


  • Are you living someone else’s dream or your own?
  • How do you envision your life being different?
  • What are the things that matter most to you?
  • What seems to be getting in the way of you making the changes you desire?
  • What have you been doing differently to get unstuck?

Self-reflection, goal setting and prioritization of you daily life will help you initiate the change you need to feel better and move on. Be cognizant of the areas that may rob your motivation and set your mind to getting unstuck. Whenever you feel you might be slipping or you begin to negative self-talk – immediately change your thinking and think your way to success with positive self-talk. You can do it, you are good enough and nothing can get in your way if you don’t let it.

Sick of Being Positive

Sick of Being Positive

Set goals, practice self-discipline and always think positive because you will become what you think. If we want to succeed these are the things we must do, right? Frankly, I get tired of always trying to think positive and be the best that I can be. It’s hard! Often times when I fail and throw myself a pity party or flash my brights at the car that just cut me off and yell profanities I feel guilty. Guilt casts a huge shadow on the progress I’ve made and illuminates all my faults, slips and failures. It is safe to say, guilt is not my friend.

So what do you do when everyone is telling you to be more positive and any negative thought is pointed out, criticized and judged? You know what I do? I take it with a grain of salt. I compare my life today to yesterday. Am I doing better? Am I still taking steps towards being the person I want to be and achieving the goals I have set? If the answer is ‘yes’ then I keep on plugging away. On the other hand, if I am letting others push my buttons, losing control and routinely yelling profanities at ignorant drivers then I may need to take steps to keep these actions from becoming a habit and get in the way of the life I am hoping to create.

Obviously I want to live a joy-filled and peaceful life but I am not God. I will never be perfect and I need to accept the fact that I will make mistakes BUT each day I have a choice. I can get out of bed and be a little bit more, patient, caring, compassionate, loving, giving and self-disciplined than the previous day. If I stumble I can refuse to let one, two, three little mistakes rob me of the joy of eight successes for the day. Tomorrow always offers new opportunities of its own. Refuse to be defeated and discouraged! On those days when you are sick of being positive don’t beat yourself up for feeling negatively. Try to determine the root cause; maybe there is too much stress at work or family bickering. If you can tackle the root cause the feeling will go away.

When you do stumble don’t let guilt rob you of your joy. Get up, brush yourself off and get back on that horse.